Saturday, November 8, 2008

Please tell me "WHY"

1. Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?

2. Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough money?

3. Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

4. Why doesn't glue stick to the bottle?

5. Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

6. Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

7. Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

8. Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

9. Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lips"?

10. If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

11. Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

12. Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

13. Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

14. Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

15 Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

16. How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

17. When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?"

18. Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

19. In Winter, why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in Summer, when we complained about the heat in Summer?

20. How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

Monday, September 29, 2008

Find solution for a real problem!!

One fine day, a bus driver went to the bus garage, started his bus, and drove off along the route. No problems for the first few stops - a few people got on, a few got off, and things went generally well.

At the next stop, however, a big hulk of a guy got on. Six feet eight,built like a wrestler, arms hanging down to the ground. He glared at the driver and said, “Big John doesn’t pay!” and sat down at the back.

Did I mention that the driver was five feet three, thin, and basically meek? Well, he was. Naturally, he didn’t argue with Big John, but he wasn’t happy about it. The next day the same thing happened - Big John got on again, made a show of refusing to pay, and sat down. And the next day, and the next.

This grated on the bus driver, who started losing sleep over the way Big John was taking advantage of him. Finally he could stand it no longer. He signed up for body building courses, karate, judo, and all that good stuff.

By the end of the summer, he had become quite strong; what’s more, he felt really good about himself. So on the next Monday, when Big John once again got on the bus and said, ” Big John doesn’t pay!”

The driver stood up, glared back at the passenger, and screamed, “And why not?”

With a surprised look on his face, Big John replied, ” Big John has a bus pass.”

Management Lesson: “Be sure there is a problem in the first place before working hard to solve one.”

“Think Outside of the Box.”

Question 1 :
You are driving along in your car on a wild, stormy night, it’s raining
heavily, when suddenly you pass by a bus stop, and you see three
people waiting for a bus:

An old lady who looks as if she is about to die.

An old friend who once saved your life.

The perfect partner you have been dreaming about.

Which one would you choose to offer a ride to, knowing very well that there
could only be one passenger in your car?

* You could pick up the old lady, because she is going to die, and thus you
should save her first;

* or you could take the old friend because he once saved your life, and this
would be the perfect chance to ! pay him back.

* However, you may never be able to find your perfect mate again.

The Perfect Choice Would Be:
“I would give the car keys to my Old friend and let him take the lady to the
hospital. I would stay behind and wait for the bus with the partner of my
dreams.”

Question 2:
What will you do if I run away with your sister?”

The candidate who was selected answered ” I will not get a better match for
my sister than you sir”

Question 3 :
Interviewer:

What is one morning you woke up & found that you were pregnant.

Girl:

I will be very excited and take an off, to celebrate with my husband.
Normally an unmarried girl will be shocked to hear this

Question 4 :
Interviewer: He ordered a cup of coffee for the candidate.

Coffee arrived kept before the candidate, then he asked what is before you?

Candidate: Instantly replied “Tea”
Why did he say “TEA” when he knows very well that coffee was kept before.
Answer: The question was “What is before you (U - alphabet) Reply was “TEA”
( T - alphabet)
Alphabet “T” was before Alphabet “U”

Question 5:
The interviewer asked to the candidate “This is your last question of the
interview. Please tell me the exact position of the center of this table where
u have kept your files.”

Candidate confidently put one of his finger at some point at the table and
told that this was the central point at the table.
Interviewer asked how did u get to know that this being the central point of
this table, then he answers quickly that sir u r not likely to ask any more question,
as it was the last question that u promised to ask…..

Sometimes, we gain more if we are able to give up our stubborn thought
limitations. Never forget to “Think Outside of the Box.”

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Small Interesting Fact of this world!

1. Chewing on gum while cutting onions can help a person from stop producing tears.

2. Until babies are six months old, they can breathe and swallow at the same time. Indeed convenient!

3. Offered a new pen to write with, 97% of all people will write their own name.

4. Male mosquitoes are vegetarians. Only females bite.

5. The average person’s field of vision encompasses a 200-degree wide angle.

6. To find out if a watermelon is ripe, knock it, and if it sounds hollow then it is ripe.

7. Canadians can send letters with personalized postage stamps showing their own photos on each stamp.

8. Babies’ eyes do not produce tears until the baby is approximately six to eight weeks old.

9. It snowed in the Sahara Desert in February of 1979.

10. Plants watered with warm water grow larger and more quickly than plants watered with cold water.

11. Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times.

12. Grapes explode when you put them in the microwave.

13. Those stars and colours you see when you rub your eyes are called phosphenes.

14. Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.

15. Everyone’s tongue print is different, like fingerprints.

16. Contrary to popular belief, a swallowed chewing gum doesn’t stay in the gut. It will pass through the system and be excreted.

17. At 40 Centigrade a person loses about 14.4 calories per hour by breathing.

18. There is a hotel in Sweden built entirely out of ice; it is rebuilt every year.

19. Cats, camels and giraffes are the only animals in the world that walk right foot, right foot, left foot, left foot, rather than right foot, left foot.

20. Onions help reduce cholesterol if eaten after a fatty meal.

21. The sound you hear when you crack your knuckles is actually the sound of nitrogen gas bubbles bursting

Thinking out of the box……..

Q.How can you drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it?
A. Concrete floors are very hard to crack!

Q.If it took eight men ten hours to build a wall, how long would it take four men to build it?
A.. No time at all it is already built.

Q.If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four apples and three oranges in the other hand, what would you have?
A. Very large hands.(Good one)

Q. How can you lift an elephant with one hand?
A. It is not a problem, since you will never find an elephant with one hand.

Q. How can a man go eight days without sleep?
A. No Probs, He sleeps at night.

Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become?
A. It will Wet or Sink as simple as that.

Q. What looks like half apple?
A : The other half.

Q. What can you never eat for breakfast?
A : Dinner.

Q. What happened when wheel was invented?
A : It caused a revolution.

Q. Bay of Bengal is in which state?
A : Liquid

Sometimes just thinking out of the box is what it takes!

Monday, September 15, 2008

A Step Towards Healthy Life……

1. Throw out nonessential numbers.
This includes age, weight, and height.
(Let the doctors worry about them.. That is why you pay them.)

2. Keep only cheerful friends.
The grouches pull you down.
(Keep this in mind if you are one of those grouches!)

3. Keep learning:
Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever.
Never let the brain get idle.
‘An idle mind is the devil’s workshop.’
And the devil’s name is Alzheimer’s!

4. Enjoy the simple things.

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.
And if you have a friend who makes you laugh, spend lots and lots
of time with him or her!

6. The tears happen:
Endure, grieve, and move on.
The only person who is with us our entire life, is our self.
LIVE while you are alive.

7 Surround yourself with what you love:
Whether it’s family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever.
Your home is your refuge.

8. Cherish your health:
If it is good, preserve it.
If it is unstable, improve it.
If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

9. Don’t take guilt trips.
Take a trip to the mall, even to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is

10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity..

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

How poor we are???

One day, the father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to the country with the

express purpose of showing him how poor people live.

They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would be considered a very

poor family.

On their return from their trip, the father asked his son, "How was the trip?"

"It was great, Dad."

"Did you see how poor people live?" the father asked.

"Oh yeah," said the son.

"So, tell me, what you learned from the trip?" asked the father.

The son answered:
"I saw that we have one dog and they had four.

We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our garden and they have a creek that has

no end.

We have imported lanterns in our garden and they have the stars at night...

Our patio reaches to the front yard and they have the whole horizon.

We have a small piece of land to live on and they have fields that go beyond our sight.

We have servants who serve us, but they serve others.

We buy our food, but they grow theirs.

We have walls around our property to protect us; they have friends to protect them."

The boy's father was speechless.

Then his son added, "Thanks Dad for showing me how poor we are."

Saturday, August 9, 2008

Bill Gates’ 11 Rules of Life…


Bill Gates recently gave a speech at a High School about 11 things

they did not and will not learn in school.

He talks about how feel-good, politically correct teachings created

a generation of kids with no concept of reality and how this

concept set them up for failure in the real world.

Rule 1
Life is not fair - get used to it!

Rule 2
The world won’t care about your self-esteem.

The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE

you feel good about yourself.

Rule 3
You will NOT make $60,000 a year right out of high school.

You won’t be a vice-president with a car phone until you earn both.

Rule 4
If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss.

Rule 5
Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your Grandparents

had a different word for burger flipping: they called it opportunity.

Rule 6
If you mess up, it’s not your parents’ fault, so don’t whine about your

mistakes, learn from them.

Rule 7
Before you were born, your parents weren’t as boring as they are now.

They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and

listening to you talk about how cool you thought you were. So before

you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parent’s generation,

try delousing the closet in your own room.

Rule 8
Your school may have done away with winners and losers,but life

HAS NOT. In some schools, they have abolished failing grades and

they’ll give you as MANY TIMES as you want to get the right answer.

This doesn’t bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.

Rule 9
Life is not divided into semesters. You don’t get summers off and very

few employers are interested in helping you FIND YOURSELF.

Do that on your own time.

Rule 10
Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave

the coffee shop and go to jobs.

Rule 11
Be nice to nerds. Chances are you’ll end up working for one.

Towards Healthy Life……

1. Throw out nonessential numbers.
This includes age, weight, and height.
(Let the doctors worry about them.. That is why you pay them.)

2. Keep only cheerful friends.
The grouches pull you down.
(Keep this in mind if you are one of those grouches!)

3. Keep learning:
Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever.
Never let the brain get idle.
‘An idle mind is the devil’s workshop.’
And the devil’s name is Alzheimer’s!

4. Enjoy the simple things.

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.
And if you have a friend who makes you laugh, spend lots and lots
of time with him or her!

6. The tears happen:
Endure, grieve, and move on.
The only person who is with us our entire life, is our self.
LIVE while you are alive.

7 Surround yourself with what you love:
Whether it’s family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever.
Your home is your refuge.

8. Cherish your health:
If it is good, preserve it.
If it is unstable, improve it.
If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

9. Don’t take guilt trips.
Take a trip to the mall, even to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is

10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity..

WHEN A LIZARD CAN, WHY CAN’T WE ?

This is a true story that happened in Japan.

In order to renovate the house, someone in Japan breaks open the wall.

Japanese houses normally have a hollow space between the wooden walls.

When tearing down the walls, he found that there was a lizard stuck there because a nail from outside hammered into one of its feet.

He sees this, feels pity, and at the same time curious, as when he checked the nail, it was nailed 10 years ago when the house was first built.

What happened?

The lizard has survived in such position for 10 years !

In a dark wall partition for 10 years without moving, it is impossible and mind-boggling.

Then he wondered how this lizard survived for 10 years!!! Without moving a single step - since its foot was nailed !

So he stopped his work and observed the lizard, what it has been doing, and what and how it has been eating.

Later, not knowing from where it came appears another lizard, with food in its mouth.

Ah! He was stunned and touched deeply.

For the lizard That was stuck by nail, another lizard has been feeding it for the past 10 years…

Imagine ! it has been doing that untiringly for 10 long years, without giving up hope on its partner.

Think. Would you do that for your partner ?

Think. Would you do it for your Mom who brought you after a big struggle of nine long months ?
Or for your Dad, Friends, brothers and Sisters ?

Imagine what a small creature can do that a creature blessed with a brilliant mind can’t.

As information and communication technology advances, our access to information becomes faster and faster. But the Distance between human beings . . . is it getting closer as well ?

Please never abandon your loved ones
Never Say U R Busy When They Really Need You ….

You May Have The Entire World At Your Feet…..
But You Might Be The Only World To Them….

A Moment of negligence might break the very heart which loves you thru all odds..

Before you say something just remember. It takes a moment to Break but an entire life to make…

To Survive use your Brains,

but to Live, use your Heart.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Existance of GOD - One of the best arguments

An atheist professor of philosophy speaks to his class on the problem science has with God, The Almighty.
He asks one of his new students to stand and.....
Prof:
So you believe in God?

Student:

Absolutely, sir.

Prof

: Is God good?

Student:

Sure.

Prof:

Is God all-powerful?

Student

: Yes..

Prof:
My brother died of cancer even though he prayed to God to heal him.
Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill. But God didn't. How is this God good then? Hmm?

(Student is silent.)

Prof:
You can't answer, can you? Let's start again, young fella. Is God good?

Student:

Yes.

Prof:

Is Satan good?

Student

: No.

Prof:
Where does Satan come from?

Student:

From....God...

Prof:
That's right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?

Student:

Yes.

Prof:
Evil is everywhere, isn't it? And God did make everything. Correct?

Student:

Yes.

Prof:

So who created evil?

(Student does not answer.)

Prof:
Is there sickness? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the world, don't they?

Student:

Yes, sir.

Prof:

So, who created them?

(Student has no answer.)

Prof:
Science says you have 5 senses you use to identify and observe the world around you.
Tell me, son...Have you ever

seen God?

Student:

No, sir.

Prof:
Tell us if you have ever heard your God?

Student:

No, sir.

Prof:
Have you ever felt your God, tasted your God, smelt your God? Have you ever had any sensory perception of God for that matter?

Student:
No, sir. I'm afraid I haven't.

Prof:
Yet you still believe in Him?

Student:

Yes.

Prof:
According to empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, science says your GOD doesn't exist.
What do you say to that, son?

Student:
Nothing. I only have my faith.

Prof:
Yes. Faith. And that is the problem science has.

Student:
Professor, is there such a thing as heat?

Prof:

Yes.

Student:
And is there such a thing as cold?

Prof:

Yes.

Student:
No sir. There isn't.
(The lecture theatre becomes very quiet with this turn of events.)

Student
: Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat.
But we don't have anything called cold. We can hit 458 degrees below zero which is no heat, but we can't go

any further after that.
There is no such thing as cold . Cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of

heat
. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy . Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it .
(There is pin-drop silence in the lecture theatre.)

Student:
What about darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as darkness?

Prof:
Yes. What is night if there isn't darkness?

Student :
You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is the absence of something. You can have low light, normal light, bright
light, flashing light....But if
you have no light constantly, you have nothing and it's called darkness, isn't it? In
reality, darkness isn't. If it were you would be able to make
darkness darker, wouldn't you?

Prof:
So what is the point you are making, young man?

Student:
Sir, my point is your philosophical premise is flawed.

Prof:
Flawed? Can you explain how?

Student:
Sir, you are working on the premise of duality. You argue there is life and then there is death, a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, science can't even explain a thought.. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one.To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death is not the opposite of life: just the absence of it.
Now tell me, Professor.Do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?

Prof:
If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process, yes, of course, I do.

Student:
Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?
(The Professor shakes his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument is going.)

Student:
Since no one has ever observed the process of evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a scientist but a preacher? (The class is in uproar.)

Student:
Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the Professor's brain?
(The class breaks out into laughter.)

Student
: Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor's brain, felt it, touched or smelt it? No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established rules of empirical, stable, demonstrable protocol, science says that you have no brain,sir.
With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your lectures, sir?
(The room is silent. The professor stares at the student, his face unfathomable.)

Prof:
I guess you'll have to take them on faith, son.

Student:
That is it sir... The link between man & god is FAITH . That is all that keeps things moving & alive.

NB: I believe you have enjoyed the conversation...and if so...you'll probably want your friends/colleagues to enjoy the same...won't you?....
this is a true story, and the

student was none other than......... APJ Abdul Kalam, the former president of India .

Amazing calculation about Benazir Bhutto's life (9)

Benazir Bhutto:-

Born in 1953.
1+9+5+3 = 18 = 1+8 = 9

First suicidal attack on her
on 18 Oct.
1+8 = 9

Second Suicidal attack in which she died.
27 Dec.
2+7 = 9

She died in the year
2007
2+0+0+7 = 9

And the Total Period from 1953 to 2007 is 54 years.
5+4 = 9

She got married on 18 Dec.
1+8 = 9

& She went Out of pakistan for 9 years in 1998
1+9+9+8 = 27 = 2+7 = 9

& Came back in 2007
2+0+0+7 = 9

His Brother Shahnawaz bhutto has been murdered in 1980
1+9+8+0 =18 =1+8 =9

&
if you write Benazir Bhutto in urdu langauge (urdu text)
it contains 9 alphabets!

what do u think!
isnt Amazing?

How to Show your name next to Clock in Taskbar?

1. Click on Start, click Settings, click Control Panel.

2. Double click on Regional and Language options.

3. Then Click on Customize option next to ‘English(United State)’.

4. In the new window, click on the Time tab at the top.

5. Then Change AM to PM in the drop down box.

6. Then change PM to manually type your name.

7. Click on Apply and Ok

After doing above, double click on Clock on bottom right part of the screen to open ‘Date and Time properties window'.

Next to the Time display, click on the arrow: it will change AM/PM to your name.

Now You will find your name with the CLOCK